Articles & Devotionals
How Do You Do It?
How do you do it? This question, which refers to living and dealing daily with tragedy and adversity in our lives, has been asked of me many times since July of 1997 when my first wife died in an auto accident. It is a question that I answer with confidence by simply saying “I trust the Lord and he helps me through”. And for me this explanation is sufficient. But often this statement has come to task with the question of “how” do you trust in the Lord to receive this help? “How do you do it”? This question has come by way of others who have suffered loss, been betrayed by their mates, or other suffered adversities. And it has made me stop and examine “how do you do it”?
First let me say that for several years after Kathy went home to be with our Lord there were days when I had to “push back” from the job and activities that we did together and let the Lord take over and “get me through the day”. During that time there was an emptiness that would creep in and try to take over. This emptiness was often triggered by a place we used to go, by a song we used to sing in our worship to God, by accidently laying my hand on the empty seat beside me in worship, even the hardship of another brother or sister who was hurting. I say these things to help you understand that “doing it”, making it through each day, can be and often is a challenge, that it takes effort, continually, to not let hurt and emptiness pull us down but rather stay the course. To keep the faith it takes to attain heaven alive and strong. This can only be done by believing, unwaveringly, in God and having total trust and confidence that He will see you through what ever your hurt is. Always remembering that God does not abandon us, rather it is we who abandon Him, and for a christian, whether we realize it or not, when we abandon Him we abandon hope and almost any chance of recovering from our hurt, especially with our faith and hope of heaven intact.
When you are hurting from loss or have been wronged, what do you do? Do you try to figure out what has happened and in so doing try to find someone to blame? Who do you blame? Someone else, your mate, your friend(s), yourself, GOD? To try to place blame is to try to hide, divert attention, or pass judgement. The one thing blame cannot and will not do is help you heal the hurt. Instead, it leaves a wound that is open and festering and if not healed will kill you spiritually and possibly even physically. Do not try to place blame, rather forgive. Forgive and ask God for guidance through the hard times. When you have been hurt in some way can you, upon looking back at that troubling event, remember a time when you had not been praying to God for help, guidance, assurance, and maybe even forgiveness? Or do you look back on your troubling event and cannot remember praying at all because all you remember is anger and hurt? Brethren, pray often (Eph. 6:18), pray fervently (James 5:16), pray together if possible(Acts 12:5-17), let your brethren know your problem so they may pray for you and with you (Acts 12:5-17; James 5:16). Never overlook the comfort, help, assurance, moral, and physical support of a righteous brother or sister. I say this again because it is so important, we often do not access the strength of our brothers and sisters in Christ. Instead we hide from them when they are the ones who could be a very big part in “doing it”. In many ways they are often the answer God has sent to our prayer. How do I know this? I know this to be true by experience.
As you can see there is no magic, no easy way out of a situation. It takes prayer, work, and above all patience. Patience to not give up on God and forsake Him. Always remember that our time on this earth is short. We all know that the bible says our life is as a vapor that appears for a while and vanishes away. And yet, as we spend our life here living it one day at a time it is all to easy to loss sight of how short live is. No matter your age, think back as far as you can. How far back is that? Ten, twenty, thirty, forty, fifty, or more years. How long does it seem like? Most likely we will remember many events with the clarity of yesterday, literally. But our age dictates that these events occurred a long time ago as the human life is measured. Now look forward, are there more days behind than ahead? We must all remember, the remainder of our life will seem to pass at least as fast as our past and as most can attest to will pass much more quickly. Always try to keep our time here in perspective. Look to the end with anticipation of going home to God and it will help you to withstand the currant trials as you will now realize they will really not last very long at all. And when it is time for us to return to God we will be able to look back at our present trouble, our hurt, our trial, our adversity, and see that it too will seem like it was only yesterday. The one big difference between now and that time (the end of our life) is that at that time all of our hurt will be taken away and only joy will remain.
These are just a few thoughts on the questions of “how do you do it”. I know they are not all inclusive but my hope is that they will point you in the right direction. May God bless and keep us all under his watchful care until our time here is finished.
In christian love
Stephen French
